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Tuesday, October 28, 2014

“I want to know what Love is”

            Life is hard, at times very hard and we don’t need to make it worse by things we do or read into. While in prison I received countless letters from loved ones that I either read wrong or misinterpreted wrong. Then sat frustrated till the next letter came, to hopefully clear up the problem. Then realizing there wasn’t a problem to begin with, but within myself reading things that were not even there…wow did I just confuse you all?  In saying all this all our situations are different yet we can take from each other a little bit of something common.
            First off I am no one special or in tune with the affairs of the heart. But like most of you I know when I hurt or hurt others. For the most part it does go away with time, but in saying that, that doesn’t help a whole lot. As with the death of a loved one time does heal, it doesn’t forget, but it does make it better. Love can be the same I would think. Most of you have a loved you inside and have not seen him or her in many years, the pain you experience is foreign to me for I was on the inside looking out.
            Both pains are very similar, yet very different. For those on the outside life goes on, bills are paid and children are readied for school. Food is bought and lonely beds are slept in another night. When I was in prison I had no bills, no sick children to tend to. My only trouble was doing time and being away from my loved ones. Which you all had to do also. I even want to say that a lot of us inside took for granted what you all went through on the outside if that is fair to say. Kind of “Out of sight, out of Mind” Philosophy.
            I’m not saying your loved one’s don’t think or is in a constant mood of caring or worrying, I’m saying on the inside there is nothing much we can do about are situation. We made our bed so to speak and now we are laying in it. Some are not guilty, some are. Still it doesn’t change the circumstances, it only makes it more frustrating for all of us. Love is a very powerful ally or enemy. It has been the cause of many a wars throughout history and has ended many a wars through a marriage.
            Love has brought families closer and at times tore them apart. I am not in any one of your shoes now, I have never had a loved one in prison. I see some of you show so much strength in hanging on to a person they have not seen in many many years and envy that. Some of you have let go and I see no fault in that either. It’s a personal choice that is made by the individual and should not be questioned by others until they walk in their shoes.

            I want to thank all the ladies who have kept my little Facebook group alive and kicking while I sorted out some personnel issues in my life following my accident. I want to thank all of you who have visited my Blog and enjoyed the ramblings of my inner self and mind. I hope with today’s “Breaking of the Ice” I will write more and get back in the saddle. Time will tell for me as it will tell for you all. In closing as always Stay Strong, and Stay your Course no matter what that is. You all Rock….